


Nowhere to Go

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-07-25
Updated: 2003-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-27 13:47:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12082287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: Justin is 32 and Brian is 43. Justin is a foster parent.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

The little boy watched his mommies die in front of him. A hand pulled him away from the car wreck.

"Where's daddy?" The little boy cried. "I want daddy."

The paramedic brought the boy over to a stretcher. "What's your name?"

"Alex Johnson." He answered.

The paramedic motioned for the social worker to come over.

"This is Marie Thomas, she'll help you find your daddy." The paramedic explained.

~~2 Weeks later~~

"Marie there is nothing." Her assistant told her.

Marie sighed. "There has to be parental records of a father. There has to be." 

"I'm sorry Marie. The only thing we found were his parents were Lindsey and Melanie Johnson. We have to put him in the system." 

"There has to be someone somewhere." Marie exclaimed, frustrated.

"Look Marie, put him in the system and we'll keep looking." 

"Fine." Marie sighed.


	2. Nowhere to Go

The boy stared out the window.

"Almost there Alex. Just a few more houses." Marie told him.

Alex sighed. "Marie why can't I just stay with you?"

"We've discussed this Alex. I can't. I'm your social worker. Besides Mr. Taylor is very nice. It's just until we find your father or a perminant home. Whatever comes first." Marie told him.

"I'm 15, Marie. My mothers died when I was three. If you haven't found my 'dad' by now then you never will. As for perminant 'parents,' no one wants a 15 year old. They all want babies." Alex shot back. 

"Besides i'm just going to run away again."

Marie sighed and gave Alex a look. "Alex he's very nice. Lives in a nice house. He's 32 and has good job. He's an artist."

"Sounds thrilling." Alex rolled his eyes.

Marie just smiled and pulled up to the house. A blonde was waiting on the steps reading a book. He had on dark rimmed glasses. Standing up, the blonde removed his glasses and Alex noticed he wasn't much taller then himself.

"Hi Justin." Marie waved, Alex behind her.

Justin smiled. "Ms. Thomas. This must be Alex Johnson." 

Alex nodded.

"Hi i'm Justin Taylor." Justin held out his hand. Alex shook it.

"Well Alex come get your stuff out of the car. Justin i'll be back to check up in a couple of days." Marie smiled and once Alex had his bag she was gone.

 

"I'll show you where you'll be staying." Justin said once Marie was gone.

Alex nodded. 

Justin lead him into a nicely decorated house. Alex noticed tons of art work and photos. 

Alex followed Justin upstairs and into his room.

"Here is where you'll be staying. It's not much but my firm is going through some changes." Justin explained.

Alex was in awe of his new room. It hosted a queen sized bed, fully furnished with a flat screen television and a cd player. "You must make a shit load of money."

Justin shrugged. "It's enough. Do you want something to eat or do you want to get settled first?"

"Food sounds good." Alex said throwing his suitcase on the floor. "Why bother unpacking?"

Justin sighed. "Why's that?"

"Because i'm just going to be leaving again, so why bother?" 

Justin led him to the small kitchen. He was use to the attitudes of the foster children. Each one was only there for a few weeks or months. Six months tops. 

"What no remarks?" Alex asked sarcastically.

Justin turned around. "I'm not going to bull shit you Alex. I know how the system works. But the only thing you can do is hold on." Justin mimicked the same words his surrogate mother Debbie had uttered to him.

Alex nodded. He liked Justin already because he was straight forward. "Well at least you're not like the others. Look on the bright side Alex, don't say that Alex..."

Justin nodded. 

Alex noticed a picture on the wall. "Who's that?" Alex pointed.

Justin smiled. "My boyfriend."

"Your what?" Alex asked.

"Boyfriend. I'm gay, Alex." Justin told him. "Is that okay with you?"

Alex nodded. "I thought that the state wouldn't allow you to.."

"Foster children?" Justin finished. "When the gay marriage act passed so did a few others. Including rights for gay people to adopt and foster children." 

Alex nodded as Justin handed him a sandwitch. "So what's his name?"

"Brian." Justin said taking a seat opposite of Alex.

"Does he live here too?" Alex asked.

Justin nodded 'no.' "We're taking it slow. He's got a loft in the city."

"Oh. So why do you do this?"

"Do what?" Justin asked.

Alex took another bite of his sandwitch. "Foster."

"Well.." Justin started. "When my father found out I was gay he kicked me out. If it hadn't been for Brian and my friend Debbie I would've had no where to go. I don't ever want a kid to have no where to go." 

"Sorry." Alex mumbled.

Justin shrugged. "It's ancient history."

"Who's the kid?" Alex asked pointing once more to the picture.

It was picture of Brian holding a baby. 

"That was taken about 15 years ago. That's Brian's son. He died when he was three." Justin told him.

"What was his name?" Alex wanted to know.

"Gus." Justin told him.

Something inside Alex triggered. He shrugged it off. "How'd he die?"

"His mom said he drowned. Her and her partner left Pittsburgh a few days after Gus' funeral." Justin explained.

Alex just nodded again. "I'm going to go upstairs."

Justin smiled. "I'll call you when Brian gets here."

"I get to meet him?" Alex asked.

Justin shrugged. "Unless you don't want to."

"Sure. Not like I got much else to do." Alex replied.

"Tomorrow i'm enrolling you in high school." Justin told him picking up Alexs' plate.

Alex turned around. "What for?"

"You have to get an education." Justin told him not turning around.

Alex just stared. "But i'll be leaving in a few weeks."

"So? I will not have you lazing around doing nothing. Now go get settled." Justin replied. 

Alex rolled his eyes and went up to his 'room.'


	3. Nowhere to Go

When he heard Alex shut the door he rested his head on his hands and let out an anguished cry. 

Justin wiped his eyes as the phone began to ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey, how's it going?" The voice on the other line asked.

Justin sighed. "Okay I guess. He's fronting the tough guy attitude but he did ask about you. He saw the picture of you and Gus on my wall and asked about it." 

Brian felt his heart stop for a second. 

"Shit, i'm sorry Brian." Justin felt like crying again.

"No it's okay. So anyways, how're you doing?" Brian squeezed his eyes shut.

Justin shrugged. "Holding on."

"Just remember you are doing a good thing." Brian told him.

"I know, it's just hard sometimes." Justin exhaled.

"We still on for dinner tonight?" Brian changed the subject.

"Yeah. Stop by whenever." Justin told him.

"I will. I love you." Brian replied.

"Love you too." Justin said.

 

Justin heard someone walk through the door and knew it was Brian. He glanced up at the clock, 5:30.

He felt two arms circle around him and he turned around.

"Hey." Justin said softly, running a hand up Brian's arm.

"Hey." Brian said back, kissing Justin softly.

Brian let go of Justin. "So where is our new addition?"

"In his room. I told him he had to be enrolled in school tomorrow and he was surprised." Justin explained.

"The mean foster parent making kids go to school. Almost as bad as the real parent." Brian joked.

Justin smiled. "Shut up."

Brian turned around and the picture of him and Gus caught his eye. "I wish he were here."

"I'm sorry Brian. I shouldn't have..." Justin started to apologize.

"Don't worry. I'm okay now. It just hurts sometimes. I never thought I could love anything until the night both you and Gus came into my life." Brian confessed.

"You want to meet Alex?" Justin asked after a moment of silence.

Brian smiled. "He's not going to be like Kristen and try to get us to break up, is he?" 

"She didn't want us to break up Brian. She just wanted.."

"... to fuck you." Brian giggled.

"Shut up." Justin blushed. "Hey Alex!" He called up the stairs.

"Yeah?" 

"Come down and meet Brian!" Justin called.

Alex came down a few minutes later.

"Hey. Alex Thomas." Alex held out his hand.

Brian just stared for a moment. "Brian Kinney."

"How long have you two been together?" Alex asked feeling at ease with this new found 'family.'

Justin looked at Brian. "15 years, on and off."

"Wow. That's a long time." Alex remarked.

Brian nodded. "Well Sunshine here has tamed my heart."

"Sunshine?" Alex asked.

"It's his nickname." Brian told him. "Why?"

"I just remember someone mentioning a Sunshine before. Oh well. I'm going to go back upstairs." Alex replied.

Justin nodded as both of them watched a retreating Alex.

"He seems alright." Brian commented.

Justin smiled. "Yeah."


	4. Nowhere to Go

Deb smiled at the sight that came into her diner the next afternoon.

"Sunshine! Brian!" Deb shouted. "And who is this cutie?"

"Alex." Justin smiled.

"Property of the state." Alex cracked a smile and shook Deb's hand.

"Well look at him. We need to get him some food." Deb smiled and was off.

Brian smiled and led them to the usual booth. "Whatever you do eat. Deb will make you anyways."

"Only because he's skin and bones." Deb replied putting a burger in front of Alex. "Reminds me of Sunshine when he was a teenager."

"Except he won't eat everything in sight." Brian motioned toward Alex.

"Shut up." Justin smiled.

Deb sat down opposite of Justin and Alex. "This reminds me of old times."

Justin nodded. "Now the Brian and I are the only one's left. The two who most wanted to get out are the ones to stay."

Deb nodded. "Well now you have this one here." 

Justin smiled. "Yeah we do." He was already becomming attached to the kid.


	5. Nowhere to Go

Months went by and Justin and Alex settled into an everday routine. Justin was getting use to the idea of Alex staying with him.

"Mr. Taylor, phone call on line 3." Justin's assistant buzzed.

Justin sighed. "Who is it Crystal? I've got a shit load of work to do."

"A Ms. Marie Thomas." Crystal replied.

"Fine." Justin picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Justin. How are you?" Marie asked.

"Okay, and you?" Justin replied politely.

"Great. How's Alex adjusting?" 

Justin smiled at the picture of him, Alex and Brian at a baseball game. "He's fine. We took him to a baseball game last week. I've enrolled him into high school." 

"That's good to hear." Marie said regretting what she had to tell him.

"That's not why you called is it?" Justin said solemnly.

Marie cleared her throat. "The state has found him another place to reside....a permenant home."

"A what?" 

"Permenant home." Marie repeated.

Justin was shocked. "But the odds of someone his age being adopted are very slim."

"I know. We found blood relatives." Marie responded.

"Who?" Justin wanted to know.

"You know I can't tell you that information Justin." Marie sighed.

"So you're saying he has to leave?" Justin stated.

Marie nodded. "Yeah."

"When?"

"One week." Marie regretted telling him.

Justin nodded. "Okay."

"I'm sorry Justin." Marie told him.

"No, it's okay. I knew about this. I knew not to get attached to any of the kids. I knew." Justin replied and hung up.

Over the past months Justin had come to really love Alex. He was like the son Justin never had. 

"Crystal." Justin buzzed her.

"Yes Mr. Taylor?" 

"Contact Alex's school. Tell them I'm signing him out for the rest of the day. Oh and also tell Mr. Kinney I left." Justin told her.

"Sure thing. Anything else?" 

"No." Justin stood up from his desk, grabbed his portfolio and left.

 

Alex was waiting outside when Justin pulled up.

"Where are we going? Mrs. Marty the school secretary sent me a passed that said you were coming to pick me up." Alex asked.

Justin smiled at Alex. "Nothing, why would something be wrong? I just thought we'd grab something to eat. What do you feel like?"

Alex looked at Justin. "Don't bull shit me. I know somethings wrong."

"Do you want to go to the Diner? We haven't seen Deb in a few weeks. Maybe go to the mall or something?" Justin suggested.

"The system is placing me again, isn't it?" Alex knew it.

Justin looked at the steering wheel. 

"Justin?" Alex felt tears threaten.

Justin looked over at Alex and tried his best to control his breathing.

"Pull over." Alex said softly.

Nodding, Justin did as he was told.

"I'm sorry." Justin whispered.

Alex put his hand on Justin's arm. "Look i'm use to this."

Justin nodded.

"I just thought that I... fuck it. It doesn't matter." Alex said turning towards the window.

"Alex." Justin said softly.

"So who am I going to this time?" Alex turned around.

Justin shrugged. "I just know they found blood relatives of yours."

Alex nodded. "So how about we going to the Diner now?" 

Justin smiled, wiped his eyes and drove on.


	6. Nowhere to Go

Later that night Alex was staying at a friends house.

"Justin?" Brian called, coming through the front door.

Justin put his book down, pulled off his glasses and crossed the living room to the door. He threw his arms around Brian and just held on, sobbing.

"What's wrong?" Brian asked softly, stroking Justin's back.

Justin couldn't speak just continued to cry.

Brian just held on.

A few moments later Justin had enough self control.

"They're...taking...Alex...away." Justin wheezed out.

"What?"

"They're fucking taking him away." Justin wanted to scream.

Brian closed his eyes. He knew sooner or later something like this would happen. Justin would get too attached. 

"Where are they putting him?"

Justin sniffled. "They wouldn't fucking tell me."

Sitting down, Brian motioned for Justin to do the same. "Justin I don't want to lecture you. But you knew this would happen when you started doing this in the first place."

"I know. I've been doing this since I was 25, you'd think it'd get easier. There's something about Alex. Something that I fell in love with. I love him like my own son." Justin explained.

Brian nodded. "I know. Why don't you go upstairs and lay down?"

"No. I just want to stay here...with you. Will you stay tonight? I know you have a big meeting tomorrow." Justin pleaded.

Again Brian nodded. "I will. Lay down on the couch."

Justin obliged and Brian lifted the younger mans feet into his lap. "You'll be okay Justin. Alex will be okay."

Brian sighed with relief when he heard Justin's breathing even out. "You'll be okay." Brian whispered again. He got up and a pulled a blanket out of the closet and settled it over Justin. 

Making sure the younger man was okay, Brian set up his laptop and started to do some work.

 

A few hours later Brian was startled out of his work when Alex walked in.

Holding up a finger to his lips he whispered. "What're you doing home? Justin said you were staying the night at Jamie's." 

"Jamie's parents are homophobic assholes." Alex replied going into the kitchen. 

Brian shut down his computer and followed Alex. "What happened?"

"I told them about Justin. They said 'I didn't know fags were allowed to foster.' You know I thought society was getting better Brian. After the laws passed." Alex stated opening a can of pop.

Brian sat down at the table and Alex did the same. "So did they kick you out?"

Alex nodded 'no.' "They wouldn't stop making homosexual remarks or jokes. I asked them to politely stop. They wouldn't, so I left." 

Brian reached out and patted Alex's hand. "I'm proud of you kid. You stuck to your grounds. You did what you thought was right."

Alex nodded. "Thanks."

"So I heard they found blood relatives of yours." Brian said.

"Yeah. I leave in a week." Alex looked at the can on the table.

Brian cleared his throat. "Don't look like you're too happy about it."

Alex shrugged. "I just... I like it here Brian."

"Sunshine can make everyone feel welcome." Brian nodded. "So anyways Alex, tell me how you're feeling."

"What is this? Psychology hour or something?" Alex smiled slightly.

Brian nodded. "Something like that." He took a deep breath. "It took me a long time to be able to say my true feelings. I was turning into someone bitter, resentful and incapable of love. Don't turn into me."

Alex thought for a moment. "I just thought...I thought this was it. I thought...no I was hoping they'd forget about me. I know it sounds unrealistic but I was actually envisioning myself living here...permenantly. I really like you guys. Justin and you have been like parents to me. None of the other foster parents ever cared that much."

"I'm sorry kid. I wish I could make it better for you." Brian was sincere. 

Alex nodded. "I think i'm going to bed if that's okay with you."

"Yeah. Goodnight." 

"Night." Alex was gone.

Brain sighed and turned around. He was surprised to see Justin standing in the doorway.

"Hey."

"Hey." Justin replied softly.

"How much did you hear?" Brian asked getting up and going over to Justin.

"Enough." Justin replied. "I don't know if I can survive this week Brian." 

Brain embraced Justin. "You can because you have to. You have to be strong for Alex."

Nodding, Justin just let the strong comforting arms hold him.


	7. Nowhere to Go

The next few days were a blur to Justin. Emotionally he was about to break and physically he was exhausted. 

"Justin it's 11:30 on a Wednesday. I have school or did you forget?" Alex asked.

Justin looked up confused. "What?"

"I said you didn't wake me up this morning." Alex told him.

"Oh. Well like you said what's the point? You're just leaving in a few days anyways." Justin replied staring at the blank t.v. screen.

Alex sighed. Justin wasn't going to make this easy on him. "You're right. What's the point? I'm just useless trash that gets shuffled from one family to the next. So you're right. What is the point?" 

Justin looked horrified. "You're worth it Alex. Just because life is shit to you doesn't mean you are trash."

"I knew the old you was in there somewhere." Alex half smiled.

Justin looked down. "I'm sorry. I just...this is hard for me."

Alex nodded. "I know."

"But enough of that. Get your ass to school." Justin demanded. 

Smiling Alex nodded and grabbed his bag. "Later Justin."

"Bye."

 

A few hours later Justin was just getting interested in his book when the phone rang.

"Hello?" He asked still reading the book.

"Where the fuck are you!?" A voice screamed.

Justin half jumped out of his seat, dropping the book. "Brian?"

"Did you forget you still have a job? You still need to be here?" Brian asked.

Justin rubbed his forehead. "Didn't I call in earlier?"

"No." Brian stated matter-of-factly.

"Oh. Well i'm not coming in today, obviously." Justin stated.

Brian let a frustrated groan out over the phone. "The boards for Microsoft were do today. I need them for my presentation in, oh less then 40 minutes."

"Look i'm sorry Brian." Justin said softly.

"Fuck it. Where are the boards Justin?" 

"Ah, in my office." Justin whispered.

"Is something wrong with them Mr. Taylor?"

Justin stopped for a moment. "Uh, Brian they are half done."

"What the hell does that mean?" 

"Uh just what I said."

"Goddamnit Justin!" Brian threw the phone down.

Brian knew Justin was upset and stressed out this week but he needed Justin to do his job as well. 

Justin sighed and felt like crying. It couldn't get any worse then this.

"FUCK!" Justin screamed. 

He stood up only to collapse in gut wrenching sobs. He couldn't control his breathing or stop the sobs.

"Justin!" Alex called from the doorway. "I'm home. You'll never believe what Mr. Manley did to..." He trailed off when he saw Justin.

He stopped dead in his tracks. "Justin?" He asked softly. 

Justin tried to stop for Alex's sake, but couldn't. 

Alex did the first thing that came to his mind and called Brian.

"Kinney."

"Brian it's Alex."

"Hey."

Alex was getting nervous. "Something's wrong with Justin. I think he's having a nervous breakdown."

"What?"

"He won't stop sobbing. He's shaking." Alex was really getting scared.

"Call 911 and i'll be right there." Brian disconnected the phone and Alex did as he was told.

A few minutes later an ambulance arrived.

Alex let the paramedics in. "I don't know what to do." Alex cried.

"It's okay son. He'll be just fine." One told him while the other went to Justin.

"Sir. I need you to tell me your name." The guy told Justin.

Justin looked up. "Ju...Ju...J...J..." 

"It's okay sir. Take your time. Can you stand for me?" 

Justin tried to but his knees gave out. The paramedic grabbed onto him and walked him out to the ambulance.

"Son what's his name?" The other paramedic asked.

"Justin Taylor." Alex replied.

The paramedic scribbled that down into his notepad. 

"Can you tell me if he's allergic to anyting?"

"Almost everything. He's allergic to tylonel. He has his medic alert necklace on." Alex explained as Brian was coming through the door.

"What happened? What's wrong?" Brian wanted to know.

"Who are you?" The paramedic asked.

"Brain Kinney. Justin's partner." 

The paramedic looked embarassed. "It looks as though Mr. Taylor his having severe emotional stress."

"What?"

"A nervous breakdown."

Brian nodded. "Are you taking him to the hospital?"

The paramedic nodded. 

"You might need this." Brian handed him a sheet of paper. "It has all his allergies written on it."

The paramedic nodded and went out to the ambulance. 

"Come on Alex." Brian waved and him and Alex got into Brian's corvette and followed the ambulance to the hospital.

Brian got out his cell phone. "Cynthia it's Kinney. Look I'm at the hospital....no i'm fine... it's Justin...yeah...handle it."

Alex was out of the car before Brian had it parked. "Alex wait."

Brian ran to catch up with Alex. He felt a familiar feeling of anxiety course through him. He felt the air being sucked out of him as he crossed through the ER doors. It felt like Justin's bashing all over again.

"Brian are you okay?" Alex asked.

Brian nodded. "Just remembering."

"I understand." He did. He had been told the story of the Prom by Debbie.

A doctor walked out. "Are you here for Justin Taylor?" 

Brian nodded. 

"Are you family?" 

"I'm his partner." Brian said firmly.

The doctor also looked embarassed. Brian tried to conceal his eat shit grin. 

"Mr. Taylor is sufferening from severe emotional stress. He's exhausted both mentally and physically. I gave him a slight sedative to help calm him down. Don't worry I was given his allergies list." The doctor assured him.

"Can we see him?" Brian asked.

"He's being moved to a private room, room 183. So in a few moments. I also want to tell you that he's going to be kept overnight for observation. He can go home in the morning. When he is home I recommend nothing too stressful for the first couple of weeks." The doctor explained.

Brian cleared his throat. "Doctor i'm afraid that's not possible."

The doctor looked at him with a question look.

"You see this is Alex and Justin's been his foster parent for the last six months. Friday Alex is being placed in a different home. Justin doesn't realize it but he fell in love with Alex. Not in the way he loves me but in a parent/child way. I don't know if he can handle him leaving." Brian told him.

The doctor nodded. "I'll give you my number before he leaves. If any problems arise give me a call. You can see him now."

Brian nodded and him and Alex were off.

Taking a deep breath, Brian pushed open Justin's door. He let out that breath he didn't realize he was holding when he found Justin with no machines hooked up to him. There was no I.V. drip, no heart monitor, no breathing machine. 

"Hey." Justin smiled slightly.

Brian smiled back. "Hey."

Justin looked over to Alex. "I'm sorry I scared you earlier." Justin said softly.

Alex nodded. "Don't worry about it. I, uh, I'll be right back." Alex ran out of the room.

A flood of emotions overtook him. He didn't want to leave this family. 

 

Inside Justin looked scared. "Don't worry about him. He'll be okay." Brian told him.

Justin nodded. "I'm sorry about the-"

Brian held a finger to Justin's lips. "Don't apologize. I shouldn't have yelled at you."

Justin nodded again. He grabbed Brians hand into his own. Brian stroked Justin's cheek. "You know when I saw the ambulance in front of your house I was suddenly 29 again watching you almost die in that parking garage."

Justin sat up and embraced Brian. "You didn't loose me Brian. I'm right here. I'm fine."

"Brian?" Alex came back into the room.

Brian looked up. 

"There's a man outside wanting to talk to you." Alex told him.

"Did he say a name?" 

Alex shook his head.

"I'll be right back." Brian sighed as he kissed Justin's forehead. "Stay here with him." He ordered Alex.

Alex nodded.


	8. Nowhere to Go

"Brian Kinney?" A man in a suit asked. He looked about 50.

"Yeah. And you are?" 

The man straightened out his tie. "Sorry. I'm Lance Baker. I'm Ms. Marie Thomas's supervisor. I'm from social services." He held out his hand.

Brian shook it. 

Lance nodded. "Do you have a minute? I have to talk to you about certain matters."

"Yeah. Let's go to the cafeteria." Brian suggested.

Once seated in the hospital cafeteria the man pulled out some documents.

"How did you find me anyways?" Brian asked.

"Marie called your office. Kinney Advertising Taylor Grahics. A Ms. Cynthia explained where you were." Lance replied. "Anyways back to business. You had a son named Augustus Marcus Peterson Kinney on December 3, 2000. Did you not?"

Brian nodded. "What does this have to do with anything?"

"Let me finish." Lance cleared his throat and looked back at the document. "He died when he was 3 on May 14, 2004."

"Yeah. He drowned in the bathtub." Brain tried to block the pain he felt.

Lance looked up at Brian. "His mothers were Lindsey Peterson and Melanie Marcus?"

Brian nodded. "Why are you doing this?"

Lance took a deep breath. "Mr. Kinney Augustus did not die on May 14, 2004."

Brian was floored. "What?!"

"Ms. Marcus and Ms. Peterson had their last names altered to Johnson. They changed Augustus's name to Alex. On highway 543 they collided into a semi truck causing both Ms. Peterson and Ms. Marcus to die on impact. They were headed towards California. They died in the state of Nevada. Alex survived the crash. Marie Thomas a social worker from Pittsburgh was in Nevada attending a seminar and took over his case, bringing him back to Pittsburgh with her. She searched aimlessly through records in Nevada trying to find a Johnson and since neither one of the mothers had their old identification on them we were really searching blindly. A break came about 2 weeks ago when Marie was in the Pittsburgh library. She came across this." Lance handed Brian a newspaper clipping from a Liberty Avenue gay paper. 'Infamous Avenue Stud looses baby to bathtub drowning.' "She recognized the picture of Alex almost immediately. She found the names Brian Kinney, Melanie Marcus and Lindsey Peterson in the article, did a little research and found out about the name alterations, the fake deaths and from that we found you."

Brian sat dumbstruck. "You're saying that...Alex is really Gus." Brian choked out.

Lance nodded. "We need to do a parternal test but from what I gather yes he's your son."

"But there was a funeral. A casket." Brian said.

Lance nodded. "My guess is they faked their sons death. Ms. Petersons family is wealthy and has connections. They probably used those."

Brian felt tears burn his eyes. A few escaped down his cheek. "I've mised so much time." Brian whispered. "Wait! Marie told Justin you'd found blood relatives."

Lance smiled. "Marie has a big mouth."

"Who are they?"

"You."

Brian sat shocked. "What if I would have said no?"

"Are you?"

Brian sat. "What if i'm not..."

"Marie shouldn't have opened her mouth. If she didn't and it came out you weren't then we would have just told Alex you were another foster parent and moved him." Lance replied.

"So when do we do the test?" 

Lance looked at the document again. "In an hour." 

Brian nodded. "And the results?"

"Next week."

"I want them today." Brian said firmly.

"The hospital can't..."

Brian looked at Lance. "I have $10,000 if that'll make things go a little faster."

"I'll talk to the doctor." 

Brian nodded. 

Gus was alive. For months there he was right under Brian's nose.


	9. Nowhere to Go

After about four hours Brian found himself nervoulsy seated in a doctors office in the hospital.

"Mr. Kinney. I'm Dr. Phillips. I heard you put up quite a bit of money to have these results."

Brian nodded. "I need to know."

The doctor nodded and looked at the envelope in his hand. "Well here they are. Do you want to read them or do you want me to read them to you?"

"Umm, can you read them?" 

The doctor nodded and proceeded to open the envelope. "The results of your paternal test show that you Mr. Brian Kinney are the father of Alex Johnson."

Brian felt tears fall down his face. "How could Lindz do this to me?"

"Mr. Kinney are you alright?" The doctor asked.

"How do I tell him? What do I say?" Brian asked.

The doctor thought. "Mr. Kinney I believe the sooner you tell him the better. You can use my office if you like."

Brian shook his head and left the office.

Lance was outside with Marie.

"The tests say he's mine." Brian whispered.

Marie felt herself tear up. "Thank God." She whispered.

"How do I tell him?" Brian repeated. "When?"

"Tell him today." Marie said. 

Brian looked at her. 

"It's okay. The state would say he needs to be counseled into this. But he knows you. Tell him. He deserves this much." 

Brian nodded.

 

An hour later Brian and Alex were seated outside in the hospital courtyard.

"What'd you want to talk about?" Alex asked.

Brian cleared his throat. He looked into the night sky. "Alex remember when I told you about Gus?"

Alex nodded.

"Well it seems that Gus didn't actually die." Brian explained.

Alex smiled. "Brian that's great! Did you see him? How'd you find out?"

"No, no Alex you're not understanding. I don't know how to say this so i'm just going to say it. Alex you are Gus." Brian blurted.

"What?" Alex's mouth dropped.

"Gus didn't die. His mothers tried to take him away from me. You are him." 

"I can't...your lying!" Alex screamed.

"You were only three. I didn't know you were really still alive. I didn't know." Brian whispered.

Alex had tears on his face. "Why are you saying this? Why do you want to hurt me? Why?"

"Alex i'm not trying to. I didn't know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have believed her. I should have tried harder." Brian was crying for the second time that day. 

"Why?" Alex sobbed.

Brian stood up and went to hug Alex. "Don't touch me! Just don't!" 

"I'm sorry." Was all Brian could say.

"You gave up! You gave up!" Alex was hysterical. 

Brian didn't know what to say.

Alex pushed his hair back. "I wasted my whole life wishing you'd come and find me. That one day you'd make everything better for me."

"It can be." Brian pleaded.

"No! No. Because you just made everything worse."

 

Brian felt himself getting mad. "Alex do you know how much God Damn time I spent grieving for the loss of my son? Do you realize that I actually prayed, PRAYED to God to send you back to me? I didn't look for you because I didn't know you were still fucking alive! I thought you were dead!"

Alex tried to get the tears to stop.

"When I found out that you were my son...the one that had supposedly died 15 years ago...I felt myself become whole again. I love you. You are my son."

Alex let out a breath. "I'm not going to run into your arms and call you daddy."

"I realize this. I don't want you to...yet." Brian replied.

"What about Justin?" Alex asked.

Brian shrugged. "What about him?"

"How do we tell him this? I mean he's here because of emotional stress." Alex stated.

"We'll find a way." Brian assured him.

"So now what? Am I just suppose to go live with you? What happens now?" Alex wanted to know.

"I don't know. This all happened so fast." Brian said. 

Alex nodded. 

"I can promise you this. Nothing is ever going to take you away from me again."


	10. Nowhere to Go

The next morning Brian and Alex were at the hospital bright and early.

A nurse brought a wheel chair into the room.

"I don't fucking need a wheel chair." Justin complained.

Brian smiled. "Yes you do." He picked Justin up and placed him in the chair.

Justin looked at both Brian and Alex's face. They mirrored each other with dark circles under their eyes and tear stains.

"What happened?" Justin asked firmly.

Brian looked at Justin. "Nothing."

Justin gave Brian a look.

"Nothing." Brian repeated.

"I'll let it go now because i'm to tired to pursue. But once i'm rested I expect an explaination from the both of you." Justin said firmly.

Brian gave Alex a look and pushed Justin out to his corvette.

Justin smiled as Brian pulled up into the driveway of his house. 

"I'm going to help you get settled then take Alex here for a while." Brian explained helping Justin into the house.

Justin nodded.

"Bed or couch?" Brian asked.

"I'll crash on the couch." Justin replied already taking his shoes off and curling up on his sofa.

Brian went to get a blanket, when he came back Justin was fast asleep.

Alex held a finger to his lips as Brian drapped the blanket over Justin.

 

An hour later they were sitting in Lance's office. Marie was also present.

"I gather Mr. Kinney told you." Lance asked Alex.

Alex nodded.

Lance nodded. "Good. Then we can start."

"Start what?" Alex wondered.

Marie smiled. "Getting things set up legally. Brian just needs to sign some papers."

"What kind of papers?" Alex looked at Brian.

Lance smiled too. "Papers reinstating his guardianship over you."

"What?" 

"I thought this is what you wanted Alex. A real family." Marie asked softly.

Alex shook his head. "I'm really confused. What about Justin?"

"Well Alex, he was just a foster parent. You knew this." Marie explained.

Alex stood up. "I just...I think i'm going to throw up." Alex ran out to the bathroom.

Brian sat there stunned. 

"He's scared Brian." Marie assured him. "He does want to live with you."

"But i'm Brian to him. I'm not dad. I haven't been dad in a long time." Brian closed his eyes. "And Justin...he loves Justin. If anyone deserves to be his father it's Justin."

Marie just looked at him.

Brian thought for a moment. Taking the papers he changed something, signed them and stood up. "Tell Justin I love him. Tell Alex i've always loved him."

"Where are you going?" Lance asked. "What are you doing?"

Brian sighed and turned around. "Something I should have done a long time ago." 

Just like that he was gone.

Marie and Lance looked at the papers.

"I, Brian Aiden Kinney give Justin Craig Taylor full guardianship and custody over Augustus Marcus Peterson Kinney (to the state known as Alex Johnson)."

 

"Can he do that?" Marie asked.

Lance sighed. "He just did."

 

Brian was driving, he didn't know where to. He was breaking his promise to Alex. But a voice in his head told him he had finally done something right. He was giving Alex what he didn't have and could never be. A loving father.


End file.
